There is a good chance that you are finding the dating process unpleasant. But, it doesn’t need to be this way. Have you ever given consideration to the following question: What is your purpose in life? Hang in there. I promise I will make the link.
Is your purpose for living any of the following?
- To find a partner
- To make lots of money
- To live joyfully and contribute to others
It’s easy to get distracted and think it’s the first two options. After all, hasn’t finding a partner and making lots of money been crammed down our throats from an early age? If we step back, and think about what it’s really all about, we find it’s not this. Once we strip away all of the buzz and look at what really makes us fulfilled, most would say that their life purpose is to live joyfully and contribute to others.
What does this mean in the bigger scheme of things? Well, if we don’t believe that our main purpose in life is to find ‘the one’, it means that we choose different options. For example, when we are out and about, we speak to people who look fun, interesting and open. We don’t only speak to people who look like they ‘have potential’. It means that if we have had a long week, instead of forcing ourselves to go out, hating every moment we are there, we stay home and treat ourselves to whatever helps restore us. We cook something delicious, we take a bath, we watch our favourite show on Netflix. Whatever we choose to do, we certainly don’t punish ourselves with mental chatter, ‘You should be out there! What if your future partner is out tonight. You will have missed them’. Or, if we are on board with the idea that our life purpose isn’t to make lots of money, it means that we choose the job that nourishes us and makes us feel happy, not the soul-destroying one that makes us lots of money.
When we remind ourselves of the bigger picture, of our real purpose here during our lifetime – we don’t get caught up in the cycle of punishment, guilt and shame – only joy. Please have a think about what your own personal purpose is and then link your thoughts and actions to that. You will find that you will make different choices, and will be happier as the result.
This doesn’t mean that having a partner or making money can’t be an addition to a joyful life; it just means that they are not the main focus. And, this changes everything. Therefore, don’t be surprised when you do meet that special someone or work in your dream job, along the way.